Surrounding Struggles

Hey!


From now on if I blog it will be more about things I have noticed while traveling and being in a completely different country. For the past three days I went to HaLong Bay which was absolutely beautiful, google pictures if you haven't already- even though they don't do it justice. It was so relaxing and I was starting to feel myself again after my volunteering. It was calm and relaxing- just what I needed to take everything in. It's crazy how we don't realize how much our surroundings really do affect us. 

 

Today I had an entirely different experience in Vietnam. I was in Hanoi which is where we are currently staying. It is full of people and crazy scooters that don't stop... ever. We were about to leave our hotel and just before we got out we heard a big crash. We looked outside our hotel door and saw an old lady underneath her bike- she had been hit by a taxi. The taxi did stop (which is unusual) and helped her. Other than that people just walked by her or kept driving on. She was fuming and definitely did something to her ankle as she was limping to the side walk. My brother and his girlfriend also shared stories about how they have seen a couple of people crawling in the middle of the streets trying to get to safety as bikes and cars drive right past. I got really upset seeing this and really really frustrated... so much that I had to blog about it. I didn't know what to do, all I wanted to do was go up to the lady and give her a big hug- just to let her know that somebody is here and somebody cares for her. People always say to be vocal and act when something goes wrong, to intervene when something isn't right or is unjust. I couldn't do something this time, I felt helpless and hopeless. Here I am standing in a strange country where the language barrier plays a huge role in everything we do. I wanted to help her but I didn't know where I stood, maybe she didn't want help? Maybe it's inappropriate for a white person to just grab their hand and help them up. I didn't want to disrespect them in any way and it really truly bothered me. It's really difficult to find the distinction of when to help and when not to. It just amazes me how people here don't care for one another like we do back home. Sure it probably happens every day but does that make it a norm... and if so does that make it okay? Maybe I'm just not used to? But on the other hand, just because I'm not used to their way of life doesn't mean it is okay or acceptable. It's a really difficult think to grasp and I am really struggling with it. Once again it brings me back to that commercial about restoring somebody's faith in humanity that always plays on the radio... Coming from working with the kids all they wanted was to be loved and played with all the time and we knew that, but here we don't really know what is acceptable and what isn't so it's a tough call. But today I didn't act, and to be honest I feel guilty. There is so much more I could have done, even if it was just getting ice, but I didn't. I just froze on the steps and watched... was that acceptable? Should I have done more? Truth is, I really don't know. It's crazy being in a different country than your own but to see different values and cultures up close is mind boggling. One thing for sure, it really makes you appreciate Canada. The first thing I thought of was getting her ice, something that they never did... my little education on minor health fixes makes a big difference, something I didn't even think about. People in Canada are so caring for one another, even if it's shown in the smallest of ways. I couldn't be happier to be from a country like Canada, I am so blessed. However, it's really important and something that I am recently discovering, but I am really blessed to have the opportunities to travel- not only volunteering- but just to experience other cultures and lifestyles. It really helps me understand more about the world and helps me to realize and appreciate a lot more about my life. 

I apologize for my rant... this day just really bothered me and I needed to vent about it so I figured I would blog- more of a reflection than anything. I am still absolutely loving Vietnam, it is a beautiful country- from what I have seen- and am meeting a lot of fun backpackers! I am off to see a water puppet show tonight and then heading back to Thailand tomorrow! Hope everything is going well back home.


Love and Miss you,
Bianca 

Myanmar

Hey!!


On Wednesday we went to Myanmar for the day. When we were heading over to cross the boarder we had to leave our passport behind- I had never done this before. And for once in my life I felt stateless. My conditions were obviously not comparable to actually being stateless but it was a strange feeling. To walk away from your passport, from the one thing that holds your Canadian identity was scary. We often don't think about how blessed we are to be from Canada and how truly free we are. Being in a strange country with no identity is very frightening, it gave me weird feelings of insecurity and the unknown- something I was not familiar to. It was interesting to say the least. 

I did not enjoy Myanmar, it is very poor and the people really like to hustle you, especially in the market. We took TukTuks and drove past a garbage dump where some of the children from the home used to live. It was incredible to see where they came from and let your mind wander in to thinking about how much they have grown and evolved. You can only imagine how far they have come from before and the struggles they faced in between. 

In the afternoon we went to one of the drop in centres related to the children's home. This is a place where children who work and beg on the bridge can go and feel safe. There are volunteers at the drop in centre that go out to the bridge and talk to the children each day and provide them with basic necessities like simple medical supplies and food. Children can go to the drop in centre and say that they want to move to the children's home and get off the streets, with the agreement of the parents they can do so. When we were at the drop in centre we ended up taking a kid back to the children's home with us. He told them he wanted to try and go to the children's home. You have to wonder and think to yourself, what was the breaking point? What happened that made you want to get out of your situation and look for change and a better future? There are so many untold stories, but no matter what you have to remember that these kids have all gone through something a child should never have to: whether it's physical or emotional abuse, drugs, or sexual exploitation. Kids are just kids and should be able to embrace their innocence in the freest of ways- like playing games or finger painting, things that are so normal to us.

Myanmar was definitely an interesting experience to say the least. It was really good to see everything start to come together but there are still so many unanswered questions. I cannot wait to go home and educate myself more and more on the matter and see where and how I can help! 


My journey has not come to an end, but it has only just begun. I cannot wait to further develop my skills and be able to continue travelling and helping people in any way that I can. From now on I will be travelling with my brother to Vietnam, Laos, and Thailand and will probably not be blogging or communicating nearly as much.


Thank you so much for all of your support, I couldn't have done this without you. 


I love you all so much :)


& have a very Happy Mother's Day!


Bianca

One World

Hey! The last couple of days have been super busy so I haven't been able to blog... but that means I have plenty to share with you now :)

Wednesday evening we had our goodbye party at the children's home. This day made my entire trip. When we arrived we just hung out with the kids by the basketball court and at their new playground! Afterwards we all ate dinner on the ground together and watched a slideshow of pictures of the past few days we spent together. After dinner was when the real fun began: we played the baby powder game. Everybody sits in a huge circle and you pass two bottles of baby powder around (similar to hot potato) and then when the music stops the person holding the baby powder has to go read a paper from a hat. The papers read different things like "someone wearing pants, a Canadian, or whoever you want" and so you had to go up to the appropriate person and throw baby powder in their face. This was AMAZING. It was so much fun! We played a couple of round until it got out of hand and we just ended up throwing baby powder everywhere. It was so awesome and the kids just loved it. Once you wipe the baby powder off, someone new comes up and just covers you in so much more! It was hilarious. 

After the baby powder game we handed out the donation bags. The kids were so anxious-excited! They each got their bags and opened them in seconds. The best part was when they all opened their notebooks and went around to each of us asking us to write something and our names. They are still learning basic English but they just wanted a little memory message. Some of the older kids asked for our names and e-mails for Facebook so we can all stay in touch! 


After this we did something so magical. It's funny because I added this specific thing to my bucket list just that morning: we released floating lanterns into the sky! It was so amazing and so beautiful. I was with my new friends that I just started to create a special bond with and we held the lantern together. On the count of three we released it and made a wish as we released it in to the sky. There is something to magical about the sky and the stars. Even when I was in the Dominican I found it incredible. I would always stop, wait, and look at the sky and try to find the moon. No matter what it amazes me that we share the same moon, the same stars, the same world. And that is the purpose of the name of my blog: One World- to always remember and never forget that we are one world. It is so important to remember that the only difference between us and them is where we are born and that no matter how different we are, we are still one world. Releasing the lanterns and making a wish was so magical, as we all watched them float away I literally felt like for that very moment we were one world, we all shared the moment together and all felt a strong bond. It was amazing- something I will never forget.

Unfortunately, after this was done it was time to say goodbye. This was terrible. It was one of those times where we were all getting super close with the kids and then it was time to go. I met Aitu just one day before the goodbye party and we became very close. She is 17 years old and taught me how to Thai dance all night. We released the lantern together and she walked me to the car at the end of the night. It was so hard to let her go. She kept telling me to stop crying and that I was beautiful as she wiped my tears away. Another girl who was only 15 was sobbing on my shoulder telling me how special I was to her. It broke my heart to leave and I haven't stopped thinking about them since. I cannot wait to e-mail and Facebook them when I get home. It is so incredible how easily you can make such a strong connection with total strangers. I hung out with these girls for maybe two days and it feels like we have been friends forever. Not a day goes by that I won't think about them and that incredible night. 

Thailand is such a beautiful country with so many beautiful people. I am so thankful to have had this opportunity and am so happy I got to share it with all about you reading my blog, I appreciate it! Every time I go on a trip like this I am reminded of why I do what I do, why I keep coming back: if you have the chance to change somebody's life and make somebody else's life a little easier- why wouldn't you take it? Every time I go on one of these trips I learn so much about the world, about the culture, and even about myself- it's incredible. I couldn't be more thankful! 


I love and miss you all,
Bianca


We are One World

The Best Ingredient: Love

Hey!!!

So this morning was absolutely incredible! And I know I have started every blog off that way, but each day keeps getting better! 

They always say you should cook with love, and today I witnessed that first hand. Today I got to help prepare lunch with Yim. Everything they use in their food is always fresh which makes it taste that much more delicious! Today we made soup with noodles and tons of veggies: carrots, cauliflower, baby corn as well as lemon grass and some mango on the side! We started of by cutting the veggies and the noodles and Yim would should us how to do it properly. She is so smart and truly has a passion for cooking. She taught us all about each food and told us where they all come from! After that we put the sauces on and cooked them on these huge woks!! When we finally sat down to eat and saw everything come together it was incredible- it tasted SO good!

The Noodles!

                                                                             The noodles cooking in the huge wok!!!

When we think about cooking, we often see it as a chore, another task that needs to be done. When I watched Yim and the other girls cooking it was not a chore at all- it was rather relaxing and fun! We listened to music and laughed as we learnt more and more about one another. We probably cooked for around three hours in order to feed all 80+ kids, which seems like a long time but none of it was rushed and none of it was tiring. I found a new appreciation for cooking. It goes back to the prayer about thanking the farmers for the rice. Yim and the other students help to make every meal at the home and they put so much effort in to it and it really does show. Often when we eat we see the food and just enjoy it, but first you should sit back and look at it. Look at where the food came from and see how much effort has been put in to. When I make stir fry at home I buy a bag of frozen veggies... here they cut up each vegetable, sometimes even in to flower designs! It's amazing how much time and effort they put in to cooking. They also cook because they think it is a good skill for the young adults to have when they are older and become wives or mothers. This is an awesome opportunity for the teenagers staying at the home, especially if they are learning from Yim! Next time you are cooking, don't think of it as a chore but rather as a gift, to provide a safe and healthy meal for your friends and family. Not every body has the ability or opportunity to do so, so make the most of it. Now when I go shopping for food, I want to begin by going to the local markets for fresher food and to support the farmers. I want to spend more time cooking and less time complaining about the "work" that it entails. It is not a chore, not even close. 

The Finished Product

               Beautiful Yim!

Working alongside Yim has been incredible, she is such an inspiring person and saying goodbye to her will be very tough. Tonight we are having our goodbye party where we hand out donations and play games with the kids! It will be tough to say goodbye to all of the kids tonight, but it was an amazing experience meeting each of them!  Stay tuned for updates on the party tonight :)

Love always,

Bianca :)

Paper Plates and Stream Swimming

Hi! :)


Yesterday the road was still wet so we couldn't work, instead we set up an activity day for the kids. There were four stations: sports/activities, music, art, and yoga and the kids would rotate between each one. I was running the art station with Gabrielle and Alli. There is something about art that is so incredibly powerful. The kids were making animal masks out of paper plates as well as crowns to wear. From the second the kids walked into the art room to the second they left, they were incredibly focused and putting all of their efforts towards their work. I have never seen these kids so quiet and concentrated. After each kid was done their mask they would hold it up for a picture and then go show their friends, they were so incredibly proud of what they accomplished. It is so neat to see how easy it is to make somebody happy. Ever heard that commercial about restoring people's faith in humanity- even if it is just by holding the door for someone, that is how I feel right now. Yesterday we just supplied them with the supplies and the kids took it where they wanted it to go, and they did it with all of their heart. It was amazing to see how easy it is to make somebody else happy. Whether it is sitting down and cutting out ears for a paper plate lion or just giving a hug when you greet someone, it is so easy and so worth it. If we have the ability to make somebody else happy, why shouldn't we take it? Why not make life a little better for someone else? You would probably want the same in return. Doing the art with the children was amazing and incredibly moving. They all worked together and were so polite and respectful. There is something about this orphanage that really demonstrates a strong sense of community- and I am so envious. The siblings take care of one another, the older ones helping with their younger sibling's hair and food, and every single staff is incredibly patient and well respected. Their natural instincts to take care and love one another is amazing. The amount of things we can learn from these kids is amazing.

Yesterday afternoon we took a boat ride to Laos which is just across the river from where we are. When we got to the other side we went shopping in a little market that sold everything from Chanel bags to cobra whiskey! After the boat ride was when the fun really began... we finally got to take the kids swimming!!

We arrived at the water and following our van were two small trucks with approximately 60 kids piling off the back! As we walked down to the water a kid would grab each of your hands and start running with you. We started walking in the water, which pretty much resembled a swamp, and were pretty grossed out. After a while we just gave it our all- if the kids can do it so can we! And oh boy was it tons of fun!! We splashed and swamp and played games all afternoon. The kids would cling on to you and jump on to your bag expecting you to carry them upstream- it was hilarious! I started off swimming with two little sisters and noticed throughout the entire time we were there, the older sister constantly checked up on the younger one and was always ready to assist her if need be. The older sister is probably around the age of 10-15 and already has motherly instincts. She is so incredible and shows so much love towards her sister. When we got into the truck to go back to the hotel she brushed her sisters hair and wrapped her in a sweater as she placed her head on lap. It was the cutest and most heartwarming thing I have ever seen. Swimming was by far my favourite experience with the kids, they were so full of life and energy and, in my opinion anyway, it really allows the kids to just be kids and not think about anything else but that very moment of splashing around in a river! I love it.

Why is it that every time you start to get attached you have to go? We are saying our goodbyes soon so stay tuned!


Love you :)


Bianca

Rainy Days in Thailand

Hello!!


The last couple days have been rainy here in Thailand which causes some problems. Yesterday we were unable to go to the orphanage because the road leading there was too soft and our van wouldn't make it. Instead we decided to go donation shopping, which was awesome! We filled 80 donation bags for each child in the orphanage. Each bag is filled with school supplies, toys, hair clips, and hygiene products. We went to the Tesco just out of town and each grabbed a shopping cart and cleared the shelves! It was so exciting to put together the donations. We will be giving the bags to the kids on our Goodbye Party in just a couple of days! 

Today was an interesting day... still raining, but we decided to tough it out and head over to the orphanage! Once we were there we looked up at the playground and noticed how much work they had done on it! There was now a huge hut where the sandbox will be and the fence is fully completed! Due to the rain there was not much work to do so we got to play with the kids... let me tell you, that is enough work in itself! We played three games: a huge game of rock paper scissors, another game similar to tug of war, and the last game was called horse where the cowboy had to find their partner, the horse when the music stopped! After the games we had a delicious meal cooked by the older kids, volunteers, and staff at the orphanage. We had rice, chicken, pumpkin, soup, and pineapple! So good!!! After lunch we decided to go home... this was an adventure. The van got stuck a few times and came close to sliding off the bridge! But we did make it, thanks to Milk (our super awesome driver)!

Tonight we are going to head out for dinner on the town by the water and then we are having a day with the kids tomorrow doing art, yoga, music, and sports! The rain has put a hold on our work projects, especially the chicken coop and pig pen! But the bonding with the kids is awesome. They love being tickled and held and even just noticed. One thing I noticed was that the older siblings really do look after the younger ones, almost as though they stepped in to be the parent. It's really awesome to see how naturally they take over the parent role and how they know they always have each other to count on. 


Hopefully I will be able to blog tomorrow! :)


Love n Hugs
Bianca

To love and be loved

Hey!!

Today was a really, really fun and relaxing day. In the morning we worked on the playground and built a fence around it. Soon it will have a fully wooden fence and sand! After that we played with the kids. We played monkey in the middle, basketball, and I even managed to get a game of stella-ella-oh-la going. It still amazes me how I used to play that game growing up and they know it to! It makes it easier to connect with the kids and really shows how we are all the same and should be treated that way. It makes the language barrier a lot easier to deal with as well! Similarly, nothing beats a language barrier than a tickle fest. All you need to do is tickle one another and suddenly all the smiles and giggles come out and every body is happy. Playing with the kids and showing affection towards them is sometimes all that they need. Every body wants and has a right to be loved. These kids have been exposed to some pretty brutal things, things a child should never have to go through. When I look back on my childhood, I see myself running around playing games, or even going to school and playing with my friends. Never in my life would I have imagined myself to be a slave to trafficking. A child should be able to live their childhood without fear and without abuse, but instead with pure enjoyment, innocence, and freedom. The children at the orphanage are beautiful. They each act differently- some quiet, some loud- some aggressive, some calm- but you know they are all striving for the same thing- to be loved. 


I saw a girl this morning, and in fact I took a picture of her. When I saw you I just felt lost and alone... She was sitting alone on bamboo sticks and she knew I was taking a picture and looked at the camera. I could feel something, something I had never felt before, I felt a story behind her eyes. I don't know what the story was nor could I imagine what it was. Later that afternoon I saw the same girl, only this time she was laughing and playing around with me. We started off by chasing each other and then got into tickling one another. She was laughing and smiling and giggling! It was like I had seen a whole new side of her. She was happy, she was loved. It's amazing to see how just a little bit of attention and compassion can change a child's entire outlook on the human race. No longer should she feel scared or threatened- but instead loved and cared for.

At lunch yesterday we said prayer before we eat. Something I found very interesting was who they thanked during prayer. As you know in many part of Asia, rice is very popular. The children pray and thank the farmers for all of their hard work making the rice and promise not to drop a grain of rice on the floor. When have you ever prayed and actually thanked the farmer? I don't think we do, and if we do it is not nearly often enough. With all the work that farmers do, we often overlook the fact that they put food on our tables nearly every meal. The fact that the children will not waste food is amazing as well- and they literally lick their plates clean. Next time you pray or eat, think about who to really thank for your meal and to eat everything you grab as a sign of respect for those who helped prepare your meal

I cannot wait to go back to the orphanage tomorrow and share more and more love with each child. Tomorrow we will be working on the playground again and then hopefully taking the kids swimming in the river! Stay tunes :)


Love and Hugs
Bianca 


"The greatest thing you'll ever learn is just to love and be loved in return" 
- Moulin Rouge

The Power of Art

Hey!

Today was our first work day and it was super awesome! In the morning we got organized to the pig pen and chicken coop along with the rearrangement of the playground. After this we ate lunch with the kids and had delicious ice cream sandwiches- literally ice cream between two pieces of bread!

The afternoon was amazing. One of the main inspirations behind this entire orphanage is the power of art. Art has so many meanings and truly encourages free expression. Today we met Yim, which means smile in Thai. She is so beautiful and full of life and energy. Yim is an art teacher and loves the idea of bringing creativity out in the kids. A new library is being build near the orphanage which will have plenty of books as well as a place for relaxation and mediation. On the outside of this library Yim decided to put flowers, butterflies, snails, and any other cute little creature you could imagine. So with that, today my friend Gabrielle and I sculpted a big butterfly on the outside of the library. I asked Yim if it was big enough and she just told me to make it feel real. And so we did, we made it bigger and with more life by adding cute little polka dots on the wings. Through art, you are able to express emotions and thoughts that some people would not share otherwise. You are able to be whoever you want to be without any judgment. When thinking about the children and all that they have been through and exposed to, art can be an amazing therapy.

Today was an amazing day, I learnt so much and have so much new appreciating for art and all that it has to offer. I cannot wait to go back tomorrow and continue working on the library tomorrow!

Almost time for pad thai and cashew chicken- yum yum!!

Love and miss you :)
Bianca

This is Heather (one of our leaders) sculpting a snail with one of the kids!

Some of the newer designs on the library!

A Day in a New Old Life

Hey!!

Today was the day I was waiting for. We had our awareness tour today and saw some absolutely amazing things. We started off the day by going to see the Golden Triangle. This is where Thailand, Myanmar (Burma), and Laos all meet! After that we went to an Opium museum and learnt all about its how the people used it: including the best position, the different types of pipes, how it can be used in morphine and heroine, and the consequences for using it. After the museum we went to what I considered my favourite part of the day: we went to a temple. This temple is for Buddhism and Burmaism. In here we learnt what the different poses mean and why people go to them. For example, one pose means teaching and another means control. After walking around the pagoda we asked the monk some questions. Following this he blessed each and every one of us and told us that beauty is in everything. When he blessed my hand he was encouraging all of the bad and evil problems to leave my body and then put a white bracelet on my wrist. It was so enlightening and interesting to learn about the culture in Thailand. One of the main things they focus on is embracing sacrifice. With our religion we always see sacrifice as a problem and as negative, where they actually encourage us to dig deep and figure out where that sacrifice can lead you in the future.

The Golden Triangle:

In the afternoon we met Kru Nam, the founder of the orphanage we will be working in. She told us the amazing story of how she went about finding the orphanage. At first she was focused on art and making money which drastically changed when she realized there were people in her own country eating from garbage and struggling each and every day. With this she decided to help the children of her country. She found out that the largest HIV outbreak was in Chiang Mai, not far from where we are now. Kru Nam began to show the children art and realized how happy it made them. It brought meaning and worth to their lives, which was so inspiring. She then realized that she can use her art to help other people and focused on opening up the orphanage and allow children an opportunity to get off the streets. She noticed that taking the children away was not necessarily a good thing since they were a source of income to the family so she offered help to the mothers as well. This has allowed the children to receive education, some even post-secondary which is absolutely incredible.

Kru Nam is my hero. She is exactly the person I needed to meet in order to be inspired again and realize that I can make a difference. She struggled with how overwhelming it can be to help such a huge issue but never gave up and now has over 100 children in the orphanage. Kru Nam is without a doubt a hero. She is so beautiful and genuine and so selfless in every action she does. I cannot wait to continue working alongside her for the next couple of days.

Our projects for this week are working on the chicken/pig pen, working around the playground, and if time painting in the nursery! We finally met the kids today, they are all so beautiful and full of life. It's amazing to see them so happy and actually enjoying life as a child. What struck me most about today and which will continue to strike me throughout the trip is when I was sitting in the orphanage today... I was playing with a kid and then we stopped and I sat there alone, I looked up each child and thought to myself: I don't know what any of you have been through... and all I could think of was the worst. So many of these children have been sexually exploited, and they range from 3 months old to 19. It really does show you to never judge a book by its cover and that everybody has a story. It encourages me to treat everybody with respect and dignity- because that's exactly how everybody should feel- wanted and loved, no matter what. I cannot wait to learn more and more about the children as the trip goes on, they are all so inspiring in their own unique ways!

I titled my blog "A Day in a New Old Life" because of all of the memories that came pouring back to me from my previous trips. The happiness within children, the inspiration among people like Kru Nam, it reminds me so much of why I come back on these trips and I love it- I never want it to go away. Although Thailand is different in terms of culture and our project, it still has the same hope and love as any other country I have been to. I love the life here and look forward to experiencing it over the next week

Tomorrow is our first work day! I will hopefully have a blog up tomorrow evening explaining how amazing and awesome it was :)

Any questions, don't hesitate to ask!

I love and miss you all!

xxoo

B

"Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle"




P.S. until I learn to rotate pictures.. I am sorry :)

Opium Flowers

Big Buddha :)